If I am not for myself

I got a message last week: ‘what about the Palestinian trauma?’ It was in reaction to a piece on trauma care and response of two Israeli organisations, Natal and Kashouvot, both working in a post October 7 Israel, offering care and recovery to different sectors of society. Natal specifically works with those who have experienced violence and terrorism, those who have lost loved ones or been severely injured, and families of victims of the October 7 attacks. Kashouvot is building a brand new sector in Israel of chaplains in hospitals, offering spiritual care to those who are unwell. 

There isn’t really a good answer to the question. As someone who posts often on social media, I get a lot of push back, “Free Palestine” and in addition some gruesome written attacks, most of which I just delete. The ordinary content I post is on Judaism so I find it pretty unacceptable that people shout “Free Palestine” at my online content, which is only speaking to Jewish life in the UK and Europe. This is one of the ultimate splits of Jewish life: can I just be a European Jew and be a protected minority community where I live? Can I also acknowledge and celebrate my deep ties to Israel, with my family and friends there, alongside our cultural, ethnic and religious links to this place?

Can I do both?

Last week I was posting about Israel. I was there, in the middle of it all, trying to distil some of what I had learnt. It is an imperfect science. I am only meeting with Israelis in Israel, some are Palestinian Arab Israelis but on this trip I am very much in the mainstream of the Israeli story. One of the questions that was mirrored back in this session with Natal is: “is there capacity to share expertise that Natal has developed with the Palestinian community?” The answer came that the organisation was already involved in this work with the Palestinian Israeli community in the North, the majority population in that region of Israel. It’s not a complete answer; our teacher acknowledges that sharing across borders with these communities is a distant prospect at this time. This is part of the Hamas agenda, blowing up all the ties and possibility for closeness and advancement between Israelis and Palestinians. 

It is so complex, I would not be able to travel to Gaza, I am not welcome there, I would likely be killed. I have done a lot of work in my life meeting with and learning from Palestinian community in the West Bank and East Jerusalem, and I would like to renew this work and these trips soon. In this trip it felt important to listen to those in my community, in my friendship circle, to colleagues and family. I had not seen most of these people in more than a year. 

‘What about the Palestinian trauma?’ With every person I meet in my week-long trip there is a strong sense of both people’s trauma; yes, our trauma comes first, those still held captive, those murdered, the toll it takes on our soldiers who serve, but the second heavy breath acknowledges the trauma of the people who live often just a few kilometres from Israeli towns and villages. 

The bit that Israelis are unwilling to do is to take carte blanche responsibility for Palestinian suffering. The war that we are currently fighting was in part commissioned and paid for by Iran and was an invasion into Israel that caused tremendous suffering. Israel should not be absolved of its responsibility when it drops bombs on Gaza, not by any stretch; Israel and the Jews are already paying a price for a deeply unpopular war. At the same moment, most people I met in Israel see this war as one of necessity, to oppose the Hamas terror regime and to protect Israeli civilians. People disagree fundamentally with the way the war has been fought but acknowledge that the primary responsibility of any government is to protect its people. The country is broadly united against Hamas in the south, against Hezbollah in the North or now in Syria. 

In last week’s Parsha, while I was in Israel, it describes Jacob splitting his camp ‘לשני מחנות’ (Genesis, 32:8). He sees Esau, his brother and enemy, down the road and he acts to protect his people. As we journey through the stories of our ancestors, some of these stories are truly chilling. The idea that in 2023 and into 2024 that there would be communities in the world who would live in fear of persecution is unthinkable - that people would have to think who would live and who would die. The immediate past grief of many in Israel right now is of a day in October when in the streets of small Israeli villages along the Gaza border, people were mown down without pause or mercy. 

Many who we’ve met along the way have been anti-war, anti-violence. People are ‘anti-this-war’, praying it will soon end, that our hostages will be freed! In the name of Rabbi Hillel we find in the teachings of our rabbis, ‘אם אין אני לי ‘מי לי,’ ‘if I am not for myself who will be for me?’ (Mishnah Avot, 1:14). The Jewish people are in an ‘if I am not for myself’ moment. We are human beings that cry for the suffering in Israel and for Palestinian people but Israel cannot withstand or permit another October 7 massacre and cannot extend a hand of peace while it is surrounded by so much hostility. The second part of this Mishnah should also not be ignored, ‘וּכְשֶׁאֲנִי לְעַצְמִי, מָה אֲנִי’, ‘But if I am only for myself, what am I?’ We should never give up on our humanity, on a sense of self that holds a variety of different truths and realities, including the terrible human cost of this war. 

Shabbat Shalom

I must write something, although it is terribly hard in this moment, to distil a sense of the moment on paper or in videos I make but write to me, I would be happy to talk it out further - even if we disagree. 

I am offline for a couple of weeks, I will be staying away from my social media and posting blogs until early 2025. Feel free to be in contact and I will post again in January!